New Yorkers have always had their sticking points when it comes to dating — God forbid “the one” lives in Staten Island.
But these days, the relationship dealbreakers are countless. As dating apps have pushed singles to pad out their profiles with specifics — such as one’s political affiliation or astrological sign — discerning swipers have become preposterously picky.
“My tolerance for making a compromise has started getting thinner,” single Brooklynite Andres Valencia, 38, tells The Post. “You have to have clear determinant of what kind of person you want to be with.”
Here, he and fellow NYC singles lay out their top relationship red flags.
The wrong astrology sign Nabeela Aysen, photographed at Cafe Mezcal on the Lower East Side, is wary of Aquarians.Annie Wermiel/NY Post
For singles like Nabeela Aysen, love is written in the stars.
“Aquarians are very stubborn and hardheaded and I’m not,” says the 26-year-old publicist from the Financial District, who refuses to date anyone bearing the air sign.
Aysen is an extreme believer in astrology’s effect on compatibility — as are many millennials, whose cosmic obsession is reflected in the popularity of astrology apps such as Co-Star, which has nearly 3 million downloads.
If a guy doesn’t list his sign in his dating profile, it’s one of the first questions Aysen asks when they get to chatting.
“I know you can’t paint everyone with the same brush, but for whatever reason, [Aquarians’] core values are all the same — they internalize all their feelings, it’s difficult to read them and they’re noncommittal,” says Aysen, an Aries who is more in the market for a Leo these days.
What would an Aquarius have to do to stand a chance?
“He would really have to woo me with conversation or [write me] a handwritten card or send flowers to my work,” she says. “Otherwise, there’s just no point.”
Too politically moderate
The only worse thing than being a member of the opposing party? Not caring about politics at all, says Leslie Church, a single nurse who just moved from New York to Atlanta.
Church, 31, says she always checks to see whether her matches on Tinder are liberal, conservative or — worst of all — moderate or apathetic.
“If you’re apolitical, with the current political climate, I’m just not going to like you,” says Church, who leans left. She considers it the number-one dating red flag, and won’t even talk to guys who don’t lean one way or the other. “If you don’t care about the state of things today, what do you care about instead? Video games?”
Max, a 28-year-old from the Upper West Side who declined to give his last name for professional reasons, learned this lesson the hard way.
“I once had a musician from San Francisco unmatch with me on Tinder because I said I supported capitalism,” he says.
‘If you’re apolitical, with the current political climate, I’m just not going to like you.’
Addicted to screens
When Nick Grosche takes a date out, he would prefer that person eat their food — not take zillions of pictures of it for Instagram.
“When that starts to happen, I make up an excuse and leave — I’ll just go home,” says the 25-year-old from Union City, NJ, who works in hospitality.
Grosche, who says he hasn’t posted on Facebook in about five years, recalls one date who let their pasta dinner get cold for the sake of internet validation.
“It was noodles and sauce — it doesn’t look any different than any other noodles and sauce,” he says. “I don’t get it.”
Tommy, a political staffer from Staten Island who wouldn’t give his last name for professional reasons, has run into the same red flag. The 34-year-old has been on dates where women take Instagram photos of their cocktails only to be glued to their phones the rest of the night checking for likes, he says.
Then there are those who use their dates to catch up on their correspondence.
“[It’s] the worst! It says that he doesn’t respect me enough to put his phone down and be present,” Aysen says.
Another screen-time relationship dealbreaker? Gamers. When Camille Graham, 26, went back to a potential suitor’s place after a respectable five dates, she realized they could never be.
“He had a computer in his bedroom that he had built,” she says. When he told her he made it specifically for games, “I almost passed out. I never went back there.” She refuses to date men who live in virtual worlds instead of reality. “It’s a huge turnoff!”
Andres ValenciaCourtesy of Andres ValenciaCrappy taste in food
For foodies — so, just about everyone with a phone these days — you are what you eat, says singleton Courtney Fallon.
“It ended over food,” says Fallon, 32, of a three-month long-distance relationship with a Miami movie producer, which fell apart over a nasty debate over his taste in Italian food.
“Everyone knows Bar Pitti [in the West Village] is the best,” says the sportscaster, who now lives in Los Angeles.
Her former beau begged to differ, arguing that the now-shuttered Da Silvano reigned supreme.
“[Da Silvano] was garbage. I laughed, and in my head I said, ‘This is over.’ ”
For Valencia, a guy won’t make it past the second date if he’s a picky eater, or orders food off the kids’ menu, like chicken nuggets.
“I have had guys say, ‘I don’t eat vegetables,’ or order, like, a hamburger at a Michelin-starred restaurant or something,” he says. “It becomes laborious every time we go out. Like, is he a child?”
